On the Side of the Road

She’s no one I’ve been
In this lifetime.
Standing in a burnt, barren landscape
The wind ceaselessly blowing
The sky ceaselessly grey,
She is a little child
Left for being a burden.

And I don’t know
Who I’ll be
When I walk in the door.
I can’t see a path to you-
To us.
So I’m feeling my way
Backwards
Through the darkened rooms
Of our house;
A house haunted
By the echoes
Of expectation, desire and
Something Else-
And the fading after-image
Of our children’s belief in Us.
How their hearts break open
Like eggs
So fragile, so defenseless
When we separate.

I hold her hand
In mine now
And together we make a place
Where something green
Can grow.
And it’s terribly, terribly
Far from here.

4 Responses to “On the Side of the Road”

1. John says:

   April 1, 2012 at 2:31 pm

   Whoa Kathleen, this pulls me up short. Short of breath, takes back there with you, deep in the grief. Thank you so much for posting this… 🙂

2. Betty Idarius says:

   April 1, 2012 at 4:50 pm

   My tears are there with you both. And so much love ♥

3. Beverly says:

   April 1, 2012 at 9:37 pm

   That is one of the saddest journeys of manifestation.

4. Whitney says:

   April 2, 2012 at 5:29 am

   Thank you, this brought up abandonment issues for me, and my beginning to be willing to be self comforting. I only recently shared a memory of being abandoned on earth as a baby–was this a dream? I don’t know, but it left a longing.