I fall asleep and find a door.
I open that door and John is there
Telling me about Heart and appearing slightly ragged. I feel afraid.
Once, I opened the door and there was the man with the beard
Who had been a snarling, stinking wolverine
Just moments before- stalking me.
Me and my sister terrified through the jungle
Only to say “You haveĀ a lot to learn from fear.”
And once, I opened the door
And planets floated within my reach like jewels.
And I, speechless, felt myself in their presence.
And once, I opened the door to shallow, blue pools of crystalline water
Beckoning me to swim.
Once, I opened the door and found myself standing on the sea
Drifting northward, looking into the blue glacier holding blue light, time.
And never once did it occur to me to leave the door closed.
I want to open the door.
And each opening of the door is the first
Opening, clean unattached to other openings, new.
In dreams, fear is not something to stop me.
In dreams, I have no history with fear.
There is only the innocence of now.
That and the desire to reach out with hands, eyes and heart
And open the door.